Tuesday, May 25, 2010

The bad midwife

The OB practice I go to is a pretty big practice.  They have about 8 midwives, and 8 regular OB/GYN's.  Along with 2-3 Physician Assistants or whatever they are called. 

When I made my first official "OB" appt for this pregnancy, they made it with a midwife.  I had told them that it would be a 4th c-section for me, and they said it was fine that for the first 2 visits it didn't matter who you saw.  I said ok and had my first visit.  That visit went fine. 

When I made this last appointment for my 12 week check it was also made with a midwife.  When I got to my appt and she came in I told her I had a few questions/concerns for her.  She started to look through my file and then she looked up at me and said "I don't know why you're seeing me.  I only see low/no risk pregnancies."  I said to her "Oh, well they made the appt with you because they said it didn't matter who I saw for the first 2 visits."  She gave me this questionable look and said "really? well with this being your 4th c-section there's nothing I can do for you."  I told her how I had my NT ultrasound the day before and that with that ultrasound they were sticking with my due date that I first got with this practice of November 28th.  She looked at my file and said "No your due date is December 9th."  I said "How can that be with a last menstrual date of February 21st?"  She said "we go by your first sonogram which showed you at 7 weeks." 

I KNOW that is bull crap because my first sonogram showed me at 9 weeks.  And then the NT sonogram confirmed that as showing 12 weeks 3 days.  She said "Well if they want to go by that date fine, but we're going by December 9th."

That is NOT gonna fly with me.  First of all I have big babies anyway, so if they make me go 2 weeks longer that I'm supposed to you're looking at an 11 lb baby!!  Second of all with all the complications I had with my 3rd c-section I am scared to death to go to 39 weeks at this point!!

I told her I had some concerns about the thin uterus and about if I should be seen more often as time goes on etc etc.  She said "As I said before, I don't know why you're seeing me. I don't do high risk pregnancies."

Then she said "Well since you had your NT ultrasound yesterday and in your file it says you have a tilted anterior uterus I'm not even going to attempt to hear the heartbeat.  You saw it yesterday so that's enough."


She then got up and left.

By the time I got to the car I was full fledged in tears.  I called my husband who started going OFF.  "How dare them treat you that way!" "we are paying them to do a job" etc etc.

I told him maybe I was completely over reacting.  Maybe it was just the hormones or whatever.

I made my next appt with the same doctor who delivered my 2nd son.  I'm really hoping for some answers and an agreement to change my due date back.  I was/am so upset by my last visit.

I found out later that afternoon hubby ended up calling the practice and speaking with the Head Administrator or whatever.  She told him it was a mistake on their part for me to ever see a midwife, but that she was completely wrong in the way she handled the situation.  She told my husband that the midwife I saw should have immediately gone and gotten me a doctor to see and gotten someone who could answer my questions.  She apologized profusely to him.

Now I'm all embarrassed that he made a stink and I have to go back to this practice for the next 6 months!  UGH.

My sister suggested I call a perinatologist and see what they have to say.  Call and see if I can get a consultation with one and see what they think about the complications I had during my last c-section and if there's anything to worry about with this pregnancy.


Anonymous said...

midwives can be so insensitive...I dealt with that during my last pregnancy with my son....never again will I allow an appt with a midwife. I am so sorry you had to go through that.

WolfeFamily said...

wow, that is rough. I am so sorry you went through that. You have more patience then me. I would have told that midwife then if she couldn't help me and since i paid for this appointment she had better find someone who could help! Hope the next one goes 10x better!

Jamie said...

definately for peace of mind you should see a perinatologist/high risk dr. If you want to wait and see your other dr first, I'm sure they'd give you the referral to go there if you need it. I have already seen one this pregnancy and it was a huge relief for me, cause they talked to me about my concerns, answered all my questions and did a 2d u/s.

So sorry to hear you had a big visit, I'm glad Roy called and got it cleared up. My husband embarrassed me by calling out a nurse practitioner at my dr's office when she was acting like an asshat.

Silly Ramblings from the Manicure Table ! said...

Oh my word I feel so bad for you but also glad your husband stood up for you !! This is his child too! He has every right to do so,

Anyway I wish you the best of luck. I switched doctors mid way through my pregnancy because my doc was so insensitive !

I am over weight and was when I was preggers, I asked him if I should be concerned with the mercury level in any certain fish or if I should avoid it, his response was. Well just avoid fat cus we know you certainly dont need anymore of that !

Tell me how quickly I grabbed my records and left that practice !!
Talk about an asswad !!!

Ugh sometimes people really dont think !

Hopefully you can get another opinion and things start running smoothly !


Silly Ramblings from the Manicure Table ! said...

I thought this would give you a quick laugh !!!

The Middle Wife
By an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher.

I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second-grade classroom a few years back. When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid,
takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow

stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a snapshot of an infant. "This is Luke, my baby brother, and I m going to tell you about his birthday. First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord."

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement. "Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, oh, oh, oh!'" Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. "She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!'" Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.

"My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this." Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall. "And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, likepsshhheew!" This kid has her legs spread and with her little hands are miming water flowing away. It was too much!

"Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe.' They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff, they all said it was from Mom's play-center, so there must be a lot of stuff inside there."

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat. I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, if it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another Erica comes along.